Pay Attention!

Sinful colors and Sally Hansen

I have never been much into nail polish. I think it has something to do with my personality, or lack of patience! When I paint, smudging invariably occurs. On the few occasions I have had a successful polish application, I am soon disappointed as chipping and wear require removal and more tedium as I once again attempt the seemingly impossible. Don't get me wrong – I love the look of painted nails. I just don't have the patience for it.

Several months ago I determined to paint my toes for a trip to St. Thomas that never was. Ice storm in Dallas. Long story. I chose a color that I thought matched the waters of the Caribbean. Alas, we may never know. I discovered two things. (1) I liked my painted toes. (2) Polish on toes wears much longer than polish on fingernails. A plus for us impatient souls.

I have since kept my toes painted. I have discovered something else. Sinful Colors from Walgreens wears a very long time! I recommend it, especially for those of you cursed with an impatient nature.

The most amazing discovery of all came as I was removing my polish during my most recent pedicure. Here it is important for the reader to understand that I have a shameful addiction to diet soda. It can be so satisfying! The long wearing properties of Sinful Colors makes it extremely difficult to remove. I was enjoying my soda and working hard (tedium!) at removing polish when it became necessary to douse another cotton ball in polish remover. I expect the reader is thinking, “I know what happens here. She dumps either the soda or the remover all over the place!” Not so. I grabbed the polish remover and took a big swig! Burn! Burn! Burn! Fortunately, I like to savor the bubbly goodness of soda against my tongue before swallowing. Otherwise, I may not be alive to relate this sad story! I jumped from my seat carrying the open bottle of remover with me. I was making panicked mealing sounds - that would be a cross between moaning and squealing – as I raced to the kitchen sink to flush the vile fluid from my oral cavity! My concerned husband did not move from his recliner. He simply asked, “What are you doing?”

My discovery? Polish remover is not potable.

I Could Have Been Sunbathing!

I was supposed to be sitting on a beach in St. Thomas, Virgin Islands today, my skin softening from the humid tropical climate, toes wriggling in the sand, nails painted to match the waters of the Caribbean, lunching at one of the many restaurants at my all-inclusive hotel ...

Alas, here I sit at my computer, skin drying from the forced air, toes curling and uncurling as I work, fingers turning blue from the frigid northern air, wondering what I shall fix for lunch ...

Blame the weather. Blame the airlines. Blame poor luck.

I'm trying to keep a positive outlook. Maybe this is my lucky day? What about the other passengers of the 5500 flights that were canceled this week? Is it possible we could all be lucky?

I'm using the time to promote my writing. I rewrote my query letter. I searched out and contacted yet another agent for my novel. I'm blogging with a complete lack of humility (or is it in a complete act of desperation?) to gain followers that my writing might become popular and I may somehow hit the literary jackpot.

It is always a stab in the dark. This agent has an interesting name. This agent "says" she accepts historical fiction. This agent actually has an active website!

So I stab and then I wait. Then I scar! "Thank you for your submission, but ..."
"We don't feel we can effectively represent you in the current marketplace." Huh?
"Your manuscript does not fit our needs." But I only sent you a letter - you haven't read the mss.
"Your work has merit and your characters are well developed, but I represent writing set in North America, specifically, Maine." Doesn't that limit one just a bit?

More stabbing. More waiting.

Oh, to have been basking on the beach today!